As the title states... This is more OOC than anything else. Just need some place to get things off my chest and well, I suppose this place will have to do. Sure, you can call it whiny and shit, but, eh... I need to get it off my chest so I don't pop.
Lately it seems like everything is really changing; friendships, situations in life, etc. Makes me wonder if there are any changes in me... or if I'm still the same, but those close to me now hold new standards and I don't apply to them. Maybe I've gotten too depressed... Maybe they've gotten too depressed... I have no idea whatsoever. Where we used to hang out everyday, now it's just a few brief chats in IM here and there. It's like I've been replaced or something. Like I said, though, it could just be me.
Tension is so thick between some of my friends, it makes it rather difficult to talk to some when talking to another. Like, I feel wrong for being good friends with someone my other friend seems to be hating at the moment. I never know when it's right to just be friends with whomever you like. Again, maybe it's just me.
New influences and the like are good, but how do we keep up with the older things and friends? I, myself, have had this problem and honestly, I would love a solution to it. I know everything and everyone falls apart sooner or later, but there has to be a way to prevent that from happening. I know this one isn't just me.
And, finally, if we give all that we can possibly have to others... is it ever really enough? I mean, seriously... You can pour out everything that you have to offer, but someone always is able to one up you by producing something better. I know it's a small fact of life... but why the hell do material things even matter to some? You use them, feel better for a while, and then get bored and move onto whatever else you can find. But if you know you have something to return to... Something to cling to when you're in a rut... Something that gives you strength enough to move on... Isn't that a tad more precious and serves you better than things that come and go? I just don't get it at all.
Sorry for the rant and everything. Just things that have been eating at me for a while and I wanted to get them out of my head before it blew up. I promise the next entry will be more in character and filled with Viper's usual venom. For now... You'll just have to deal with Rei posting.